Greatness Begins with GRATITUDE!

You can tell something is true when it remains true no matter when you read it.

The Morning Pages

With Thanksgiving approaching, I love the energy in the air.  Aside from the sales and the mystique of Black Friday(like somehow everything you ever needed will all of a sudden become 80% cheaper this one day of the year at 5:00 AM  when the likely truth is you have only been slyly convinced by marketing magicians that whatever IS going on sale, you actually need), there is a genuine palpable attitude of gratitude that begins to fill the air.  People are more concerned with what they are going to GIVE rather than what they are going to GET.  The desire to express all that is appreciated about each other and the world becomes as big a need as your morning cup of coffee.

As an Orthodox Jewish Woman, this attitude of gratitude is something that is not reserved for one day late in November.  It is part and parcel of creating…

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The REAL Problem

Got another call today with the same old story and the same old truth. There is a lot of wisdom, creativity and strength in our children. The sooner we see it, the happier we will be.

The Morning Pages

A man was telling me today about his son who had behavior problems in school.  The teacher would call him up to complain about his son’s behaviors and the child insisted that it was all the teacher’s fault.  He would come home daily saying something to the effect of, “Dad, my teacher is just no good.  She can’t teach.  She just wants to boss us around and tell us what to do.”

Finally, this father went in to speak to the teacher.  He told her, “I know what is wrong with my son.”

“You do? Great, what is it?”

Dad replies, “It’s you.” 

This father courageously told the teacher that in order for her to have decorum in her class, she must develop a mutual respect and love for her students like she would for her own husband and children.  He told her that when you love your students and…

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Looking Back – Moving Forward

In Seminary, I had a teacher who used to talk to us about dating.  He would often say to us “Girls, when it comes to dating – hindsight is 20-20”.

Being married for close to 22 years and continuing the life work of self-actualization, I have found this true in so many different areas of my life.  Sometimes we look back at our lives and see all of our great accomplishments.  Other times we look back and look at all the things we think we could have, should have or would have done.  We take a more critical stance and beat ourselves up for what we did not accomplish.

It is at those times in particular, when we are sitting in the valley and looking up at the hills and mountains we have climbed and we still have yet to climb that we need to look back and see how far we have come.  We need to recognize that even some of the valleys are really mountains of growth in another area of greatness.

Last night, I was beating myself up for not having blogged consistently for the past few years.  I wondered to myself where I have been and why there were so few posts.  Then I took a step back and remembered that I was there for my family.  I was being a friend.  I was working with my clients to transform their lives from anxiety to inner strength.  I was working in my office helping to grow a business that is surely being of service to hundreds of others.  I can assure you that I was not sitting back and doing nothing.  I was showing up to my life in ways that does not and does not need to show up on the world wide web.

It is by looking back that I am so excited to move forward and share the view from the observation deck of my life and all the wisdom that came with it.  It is by looking back that I was able to see the values of loyalty, perseverance, relentless unconditional love, patience, creativity and commitment.  It is by looking back that I am moving forward.

What qualities of greatness can you find within yourself as you look back on your life that make you into the person you are?

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The Morning Pages

Keep Going – Don’t Quit (click for video clip)

Sometimes as a parent I have felt that it was just too hard, I can’t do this.  Pulled in so many directions, children having meltdowns, my own needs to fulfill, how can I manage?

I have learned that it is just at those times, when I had no more strength, that G-d was like this coach, screaming in my ear

“GO ON, KEEP ON GOING, DON’T GIVE UP, DON’T QUIT, JUST KEEP ON GOING”.

Then when the rubber really met the road, and I really had nothing left except hopelessness and despair, wondering why G-d made me the mother of these children when he could have found someone way more competent than myself, that inner voice would come up and whisper

“Sarah, you are the most influential player on this team, if you feel defeated, so will they”

Success is not…

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Creature of Habit or Designer of Destiny?

The Morning Pages

“We sow our thoughts,

and we reap our actions.

We sow our actions,

and we reap our habits.

We sow our habits,

and we reap our character.

We sow our character,

and we reap our destiny!”

-Anonymous

The prison of the past is open – new seeds are yours to sow.

Choose what you plant wisely, for YOU are the garden you’ll grow.

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Counting Down or Counting Up?

Pesach (Passover) is over and life is getting back to the daily grind.  I was determined after such a meaningful holiday of freedom to start over.  It went by so quickly that a sadness overtook me as I prepared myself to face regular life again.

I shared this with my friend who said to me “Why are you sad?  It is Sefira (counting of the Omer) and we are just preparing ourselves for Shavuos!”.

She was so perky about it that I felt spiritually unprepared and inadequate.  I tried to turn it around and acknowledge my thoughts in my journal.  I thought to myself “today is the first day of the rest of your life”.  Then I looked in my journal and saw that I had written those same exact words three other times in the past two months.

It was very depressing.  Everyone spoke about how Pesach was the opportunity to break free from the bondage of your own limitations and believe in G-d’s power no matter what the circumstances.  Now Pesach was over and I was counting down until Shavuos, which is by now only six quick weeks away.  My hope for me next level of growth was looming harder to achieve.

Tonight, after unsuccessfully trying to reach friends to pull me out of my funk, G-d’s kindness touched me moments after my son walked in on my tear struck face embarrassed by my silent prayers for G-d’s loving direction towards my happy, productive, positive self.

I went to count Sefira tonight and it was number 10.  Ten days closer to the receiving of the Torah.  I realized that I had to mentally stop counting down and mentally start counting UP.  I had to look up and forward to each day’s growth and opportunities captured and let go of the expectations that create so many missed.

For some reason, only G-d knows, I felt compelled to come back and visit my website.  To revisit the blogs that I have not seen in a year.  To hear my own words speak back to me and tell me what I needed to tell myself and would not accept from a friend.

I am going to reblog the old posts that said so much in so few words.  They tasted like sweet wine that grew finer with age.  I hope you will join me in counting UP towards a newer fresher, wiser you.

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Introduce yourself to the Nurtured Heart Approach (link)

For those of you who have been on the fence about whether to sign up and learn the Nurtured Heart Approach, I invite you to click on the link and watch the video blog to see how this approach is changing lives all over the world.  See how it is making a difference in the lives of parents, therapists and educators who are now empowered to make a difference in the lives of their children, young and old.

Once you have done that, and you decided you want to know more, sign up for my upcoming 6 Week Teleclass Series so you can learn to live this approach in your home and in your life.

I must tell you, I have been in touch with people who have taken this course a few months ago and even a few years ago. It warms my heart to hear they are still using it, both personally and professionally, and it is making a difference.  This is not just some approach that you learn, enjoy and walk away from.  You learn in those 6 weeks how to live and incorporate this approach into your thinking, into your behavior, into your life.  Parenting becomes a happier and more joyful experience for you and for your family.

I want to take a minute and let you know how much your class helped me in my personal life and in my profession as a home visitor and coach.
yaasher koach,
wishing you much success,
shaindy (mother who took the course 2 years ago and sent this to me last week)
If you like what you see on this blog, give me a call (917)843-7238 and join this class.
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